Okay so this post physically makes my stomach full of butterflies and makes me a little squirmy because I hate to “brag” about myself. It makes me seriously uncomfortable to talk about myself but I feel as though if there’s ever a time to give myself a few #snaps, it’s now. If you’re a sorority girl, you know exactly what “snaps” are. The moment when someone did a great job, helped plan a baller fundraiser and so they get a shout out and the stereotypical but so fun, room full of snaps. Us sorority girls snap as if to give a little “you go girl” cheer.
Like I said, I hate bragging about myself and to be honest, I really hate the feeling of people “fawning” over me. I’m not that girl who likes people to sing happy birthday and getting praised makes my face red and embarrassed. So even as I’m writing this post, I’m contemplating at every step just deleting it all together and…. But now I’m thinking, if this blog is a documentation of my life, photography and my successes, I’m going to want to look back at this post when I’m 40 and remember this year and this moment.
So here it goes. This year, I was nominated by my peers as the Byrd Middle School Teacher of the Year 🙂 (and now I’m blushing and contemplating erasing again..) To my future self reading this and I want to be reminded of how amazing Byrd is. Byrd is full of the best people I may ever work with! People that I love and care about, and enjoy going to work to be around. What an amazing honor it has been to be nominated by the people who I respect endlessly. People who inspire me every day to be a better teacher because they are raising the bar each moment.
An honest moment: When I first started teaching I had an old teacher from school who didn’t believe in me. I reached out to her after years and was passively rejected. She was not willing to see my growth through the years and couldn’t see me as the person I’d become. When she denied me an opportunity to prove myself, I secretly swore that one day I’d prove her wrong. I wanted to be better then she ever expected and wanted to one day know that I was good enough. Do you ever feel this way when people reject you? Motivated forward through the negativity? Maybe this is powered through the wrong reasons… Maybe it’s not. I just wanted to be able to stand up tall one day and say “You were wrong about me”. This may or may not be the best outlook but when I got the email from my principal congratulating me, my first thought was her. I wasn’t vengeful or snickering over a grudge but it was a moment when I felt like I had a stamp that even she would respect. It was the most amazing feeling to know that the people I love and cherish most as professionals see the goofy girl who dances around and sings in the hallways and still think I’m good enough.
I’m not saying that this negative moment was the only thing pushing me forward because it’s not. Obviously nobody should hold onto grudges or negative emotions that long, I surely don’t. I also don’t think it’s sustainable to work solely on proving others wrong. Really we should all be working for ourselves. To be the best person we want to be. Work until we are satisfied. And if we happen to prove others wrong along the way, well that doesn’t hurt 🙂
To those of you who have haters in your life… #hatersgonnahate. Push through it, work harder because you’re worth it, and just because they can’t see it doesn’t mean there aren’t plenty of others who do. But to be honest, do it for you because you love what you’re doing. If you’re a dreamer, keep going, don’t let anyone make you second guess yourself. Ever. And you know what, when you feel like nobody else is snapping, give yourself a few snaps, or a lot of snaps, heck put on some music, dance around the room and snap away! One day, you’re going to look around and others are going to be snappin’ too and you’re going to know that all the moments of haters are meaningless when you believe in yourself.